I, of all people in the world should not be able to laugh at alcohol jokes. But below was a good laugh. On the other side of the coin, I can feel the bile rising when I see alcohol commercials. Why is that allowed?? If you look at the statistics, Alcohol kills more teenagers than all other drugs combined. It is a factor in the three leading causes of death among 15- to 24-year-olds: accidents, homicides and suicides. And alcohol abuse ruins families, not just one generation, but several generations after the fact.
Question: Doctor: I’ve heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?
Answer: Heart only good for so many beats, and that it….Don’t waste on exercise. Everything wear out eventually. Speeding up heart not make you live longer; it like saying you extend life of car by driving faster. Want to live longer?Take nap.
Question: Should i reduce my alcohol intake?
Answer: Oh no, Wine made from fruit. Fruit very good. Brandy distilled wine, that mean they take water out of fruity bit so you get even more of goodness that way. Beer also made of grain. Grain good too. Bottom up!
Question: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
Answer: Can’t think of one, sorry. My philosophy: No pain: good!!
Question: Aren’t fried foods bad for you?
Answer: YOU NOT LISTENING! Food fried in vegetable oil. How getting more vegetable be bad?
Question: Is Chocolate bad for me?
Answer: You crazy? HEL-LO-O!! Cocoa bean! Another vegetable!It best feel-good food around!
Question: Is swimming good for your figure?
Answer: If swimming good for figure, explain whale to me.
Question: Is getting in shape important for my lifestyle?
Answer: Hey! ‘Round’ is shape!
The joke ends with:
good luck with that shit:
Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body. Rather one should should skid into the grave sideways – Beer/wine in one hand – chocolate in the other – body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming ‘WOO-HOO’, what a ride!!!!!!! enjoy life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!